Magnanimous or mean, what’s your style?

Do you believe in an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth policy or are you the aficionado of Gandhigiri? Ramya Iyer asks five young women what's their approach - 'Forgive and forget' or 'Tit for Tat'. Here's what she unravelled

“Leave no space for regrets”

22-year-old Sandya Ragoowanshi from Mumbai firmly believes that a little bit of both is essential to survive in today’s world.

“Of course, there needs to be a balance. Also, what’s mean or magnanimous depends on the situation. Both paths can be equally hard and both could leave you with nothing. So whatever the choice may be, just be damn sure that you want to do it; leave no space for regrets.”

“One can catch more flies with a teaspoon of honey than a barrel full of vinegar”
Ruchika Beri, 25, from Mumbai leaves it to God for rebuke.

“I am a free spirit who believes in live and let live but at the same time I don’t like if someone trespasses my space. What goes around comes around. But I don’t just let-go. I verify intensity of the harm and then plot my plan on how to tackle it and teach a lesson.”

“Tit for tat works for small things. But for the bigger things in life, I just let it be”
24-year-old, Latika Payak also from Mumbai vouches for forgive and forget with a degree of difference.

“Forgive and forget is more like me for the long term. Who wants to carry a baggage for a lifetime? But if it’s an action that demands instant reaction, then I frequently visit the Tit for Tat bracket. I am not into making elaborate plans and waiting for the right time to even out the dues. I believe that Tit for Tat works for small things in life. For the bigger things in life, I just let it be. It’s not worth the effort. What’s done is done.”

“My style is to forgive but never forget.”
Neha Malude, 26, from Delhi believes that wrong doers should never be let off the hook.

“Sure, you can forgive him or her and move on because honestly I can’t hold a grudge for too long but never forget what they did to you. I am not a revengeful person so I would never plot something deliberately to get back at anyone, but if that person ever thinks about coming back to me for help (you know, what goes around comes around!) they should know what to expect.”

“If you let-go of someone who has been unjust to you, they will walk all over you.”
Pune’s 27-year-old Deepa Iyer vows never to let-it-be, after a certain turn of events.

“I have always been the ‘forgive and forget’ kinds, forgiving, understanding and tolerant. Recently, I have realised it doesn’t work at all. People just don’t appreciate your righteousness and walk all over you. After a recent breakup, I realised my ex took no time in hooking up with someone else. I had been very forgiving about his moral-slip ups and other gaffes for the three years of our relationship. Now that I was in control of my emotions, it was time to teach him a lesson. He is a model and all his contacts call him on his mobile. I just cut off his mobile number which was in my name. He was wedged in Mumbai with no address proof and hence no mobile number. So that was definitely his lesson for a life-time, never to mess with me.”

Join the braid brigade

Braiding is back and is wooing us now with its glam avatars. From the undone braid to the crowned one, side braids to the milkmaid braids, these looks are what you must wear this season. Hair expert Maushmi Dhawan helps you figure what works best for you

Side-tracking braids
The Alexander Wang side braid is a prima donna amongst all braids this fashion season. Ultra sensual and ultra easy to attain!

To begin with, blow-dry your hair upside down for about 30 seconds. This routine must be followed by a small amount of volumizing mousse at the roots of your hair followed by brushing, to create extra volume at the roots. Then, make a side parting.

Comb and tease your hair all over at the roots. When it has a rough texture, pull it aside and loosely braid it. Use bobby pins to create dramatic, flowy waves on the side along with the plait, wherever necessary. If your hair length is small or texture is thin, use hair extensions. Spray all over with a texturising hairspray, if required. Voila! You’re ready with the Wang look!

Raid the milkmaid braid look
A look popularised by Nicole Richie, milkmaid braids exude a mix of innocence and glam to the hilt.

To attain this look, brush hair and divide into two equal parts. Tie them into two pigtails with transparent rubber bands. Start braiding each pigtail just before the ear and fasten them with a rubber band. Pull the left braid over the right ear and the right braid over the left ear and pin it up with bob pins. If you have a fringe, leave it on the side and let the rest be braided.

As a variation, you can braid the hair from ear to ear and criss-cross it while the hair at the back can be made into a messy French roll with a bouffant. This will create height and style, making you absolutely red carpet worthy.

The crown goes to Heidi
When it comes to the crown braid look, Heidi Klum absolutely owns the look. To achieve her classic look, you have to basically form braids by crossing two braids at the nape of the neck bringing them up around the head and pinning them to a crown style. Really simple to do but looks absolutely ethereal!

Not undone on the glam factor
The stylish undone braid is an overtly hot look. The key to attain this look is by striking the right balance between the messy and glamorous look.

Firstly, pull your hair back in a ponytail and then start braiding from the nape of the neck. Secure it with an elastic band, one inch from the end. This is not a pin-me-down look. In fact, it’s just the opposite as you need to allow stray hair-strands to fall in their own will from the braid but without making it look too untidy. If you have shorter layers or bangs, let them hang loose to the side, just over your eye.

Set the look with a hairspray. For a more feminine look, you can even add small pretty flowers for a soft and feminine touch.

Ignorance is not bliss

Knowledge of which diseases run in your family, especially those developed before age 50, can often help determine which tests you may need and when. Priti Salian gets experts to help interpret medical family history in the case of 5 most common ailments in women, helping you understand what should ring the warning bells for you

Breast Cancer
Breast cancer happens to be the second most commonly occurring cancer in India after cervical cancer. “It is one of those cancers which a woman can get from her mother or grandmother, especially if the relative in question has suffered before 50 years of age,” says Dr. Ameet Dhurandhar, Mumbai-based gynaecologist and obstetrician.

Plan of action: A monthly breast self-examination (preferably a week after your period has ended) is a must for every woman right from the time she is 18-20 years old. Learn the steps from a gynaecologist and in case of any signs of a lump, visit your doctor. Get a mammography every year after you turn 30. Fifteen percent of breast cancer patients are between 30-40 years of age so it is best to be careful than sorry.

Ovarian Cancer
Dr. Dhurandhar confirms that ovarian cancer can be hereditary and though its prevalence is not as high as breast cancer, it does affect plenty of women in India. Just like breast cancer, it could be your first degree relative like mother, sister and daughter and even your grandmother who suffered from the disease that could put you at risk.

Plan of action: “If you fall in this category the best way is to get the CA-125 blood test (a diagnostic test for ovarian cancer) by the age of 18 years, every three years,” says Dr. Dhurandhar. After 30, you can continue to test yourself every year. Visit a gynaecologist for an annual clinical examination and if an abnormality is detected, a sonogram would be advised for further confirmation.

Heart Diseases
“Families which have suffered from heart disease have a good chance of passing it on to their offspring,” says Dr. Balbir Singh, Chairman, Department of Cardiology, Medanta, The Medicity Hospital, Gurgaon. A woman whose first degree relative has had a heart disease before the age of 50 and who herself has a sedentary lifestyle with unhealthy eating habits could be at risk as early as 20 years.

Plan of action: Of course, there are a lot of other factors which add to a person’s risk of heart disease, but for complete peace of mind, if you see a family connection, get yourself tested for lipid profile and cholesterol and get kidney tests done, at 18. Dr. Singh also suggests an ECG besides these tests. Repeat the tests every five years if there is no abnormality detected and every year if there is. Hypertension can hit earlier, so blood pressure should be monitored even as a kid.

Diabetes
Recent research indicates that India could soon become the diabetes capital of the world. “A mother who suffers from diabetes is likely to pass on the disease to her daughter, though there’s less chance of a woman getting it from her father,” says an Army doctor from Ranchi. But, again, it is not necessary that a woman whose mother or grandmother has been diabetic also turns into one if she has a fairly healthy lifestyle. There are plenty of reasons which can lead to diabetes. Metabolic problems, hormonal disturbances and pregnancy are just some of them.

Plan of action: Add the blood sugar test to your list every 5 years beginning 18 years if you see yourself at risk.

Depression
“If depression runs in a person’s family it does make one slightly more vulnerable to it,” says Dr. Samir Parikh, Consultant Psychiatrist, Max Healthcare, and Head, Department of Mental health and Behavioural Sciences. “The most important thing here is to be aware that depression is a medical condition which happens due to chemical imbalance and needs to be treated by an expert,” he adds.

Plan of action: The prevalence of depression is high in our country and so if you experience any of its symptoms like loss of interest and pleasure, continued irritability, low mood for extended periods, you must seek medical support immediately.

Go OTT with statement pieces

There's a new movement in fashion. One, that's emphasisingand redefining fashion trends, with a twist. Be it tassels, lace stockings or power shoulders, they are in your face and stand out on their own. Trupti S tells you how to say hello to OTT fashion dramas and say goodbye to understated performances

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Sass it up with tassels
Swinging back in full action are exotic tassels and not just a small peek here and there on handbags and purses.We’re now seeing them prominently on everything from shoes to dresses, belts and hats. “Tassels in different forms and sizes are a strong trend, whether perceived in traditional clothing as ‘latkans’ or otherwise as fringing. They work as exaggerated details trailing down backs and hems adding an interesting element of movement,” says fashion and textile designer KarishmaShahani whose collection Atulya has loads of it.So take your pick from oversized, extra long or brightly coloured.They’re outstanding anyways.

Empower your shoulders
Is something up your sleeve? If it isn’t, it should be as it’s time to empower yourself with some weight and ferocity of power shoulders. From Milan to New York, this look sported by actor Joan Collins is back in fashion with a vengeance. “A returning look from the eighties, it has been prominent in fashion weeks throughout the AW 10-11 collections of new and old designers alike, silhouetting and accentuating the shoulders in any garment style,” says Karishma.

Be it the Balmain fall-off-the cliff shoulders shrugs or the exaggerated sleeves on jackets and dresses with shoulder pads, your sleeves will do a whole lot of talking. Just remember to balance the look by keeping the focus on the upper half of the body and let the lower half be simpler.

Ventwith vintage tent dresses
Adding a dreamy and floaty appeal is the very cool 60’s trend-the tent dresses. Coming a long way from where it has originated, it sure multi-tasks well even to this day and age. “The tent dresses work well in a range of fabrics from softer and lighter fabrics like chiffon and silk jersey to stiffer canvas-like fabrics. The best thing is it compliments most body types, adding a fresh take on the silhouette,” says Karishma.

Stock up lace stockings
One of the hottest trends of Spring/ Summer 2011 fashion season, lace stockings ooze femininity and oomph with a lot of fashion relevance. Karishma says, “Lace stockings and tent shaped dresses and jackets, two contrary styles have a lot of appeal. With silhouettes moving away from the body and creating a structured look on the wearer, the lace stockings contouring are bringing back a feminine appeal.”

You can either choose classy, vintage lace with large prints or opt for tiny patterns for a more sensual look. Though our favourite are the sexy cut out lace stockings paired with a cut out lace dress. It’s daring and super hot too!

Come hitherto leather
Leather has gone through a luscious makeover post winters by reinventing itself. “A far cry from the dreary colours, it has been stained to achieve a variety of pop shades and tones, mergingits way through accessories like thin belts, side bags and even brooches,” says Karishma. From cowboy ruggedness to a dash of flirty chic, you can attain it all with leather.

Deliciously vegan

If you think being vegan means depriving yourself of all the delectable delights that you love, you are going to be pleasantly surprised. Priti Salian presents some finger-licking vegan recipes that ensure that veganism doesn't spell sacrifice

All these recipes are created by vegan Rithika Ramesh, Creative Producer and Chief Assistant Director of the just released flick ‘Kachcha Limboo’.

Masala chaas

This chaas is made from peanut milk set with rejuvelac. You can use normal curd for setting if you are not a strict vegan.

For the rejuvelac

Ingredients
1/3 cup wheat grains
2/3 cup water

Method
Fill the wheat grains in a bottle and cover them with water. Cover the mouth of the bottle with a muslin cloth and keep it in a closed place like a cupboard for about 12 hours, after which bubbles will appear on shaking the bottle. Water changes into a milky liquid called rejuvelac which can be kept refrigerated for 10 days.

For the peanut milk

Ingredients
1 cup raw peanuts, soaked in water with the skin for about six to eight hours

Method
1. Blend the peanuts to a smooth paste with half cup water. Put them through a sieve and squeeze out the first milk. The same process can be repeated two more times with some more water. The milk should be slightly thick and will have a strong ‘peanutty’ taste.

2. Heat this milk, stirring all the time. Don’t boil it. As soon as it shows signs of boiling, take it off the heat.

3. Once it is lukewarm, add 3 teaspoons of rejuvelac for every cup of milk. Stir well and let it set for 12 hours. The first time you make it, you may get a slightly runny curd on top and water below, as the fat separates from the peanut to form curd. Since this is going to be used for chaas, there’s reason to worry.

For the masala chaas

Ingredients
cup peanut curd
1 ½ cups water
A handful of curry leaves
2 green chillies
Black Salt
A pinch of asafoetida
Method
1. Put the curry leaves and chilli in a blender with a little bit of water. Blend until ground well.

2. Add this and the rest of the ingredients to the peanut curd and add more water. Let it refrigerate for 2 hours before serving.

Vegan chilli
Chilli, a Mexican specialty, is made with minced meat and beans in a red sauce. This is our vegan version!

Ingredients
1 tsp olive oil
2 cups tomato puree
1 onion, chopped fine
2 cloves of garlic
1 stick of celery, chopped fine
1 tsp oregano
½ cup cooked red kidney beans (or a mix of beans)
¼ tsp cinnamon powder
1 tsp red chilli powder
½ cup soya granules soaked in water and drained
Salt

Method
1. Heat oil and add the garlic, onions, celery, and oregano to it.

2. Once the onions are almost reddish, add the tomato puree, beans, cinnamon, chilli powder, and salt. Simmer for 10 minutes with soy granules.

3. Serve hot with rice or cornbread.

Light Vegan Lemon Mousse

Ingredients
2 cups coconut milk
3/4 cup sugar
1 cup water
¼ cup tapioca flour (rice or sago flour will also do)
½ cup agar flakes (China grass)
Juice of 3 lemons
¼ tsp vanilla extract
¼ tsp nutmeg powder
A pinch of salt
A pinch of turmeric for colour

Method
1. Bring one cup coconut milk to a boil with the agar flakes. Dissolve the flakes by stirring. Add ½ cup water and sugar and bring to a boil.

2. Mix tapioca flour in ½ cup water and stir. Let it stand for two minutes till it becomes thick and gooey.

3. Add this to the mixture on the stove along with the rest of the coconut milk, lemon juice, vanilla extract, nutmeg powder, turmeric, and salt. Add more sugar if needed. Boil, take off the stove and transfer it to the serving container.

4. Let it cool till set. Refrigerate before serving.

Vegan is the way to go

To improve your health and wellbeing and to stop cruelty towards the environment and animals, there's nothing better than going vegan. Priti Salian clues you in to everything you need to know about a vegan diet

Vidya Balan and Shashi Tharoor were recently voted the hottest vegans on a poll conducted by PETA. Not far behind were Lara Dutta, Shahid Kapoor, Kareena Kapoor, Amitabh Bachchan, Maddy, Mallika Sherawat, Natalie Portman, and Bryan Adams. A vegan diet has worked wonders for them. Let’s take a look at how it can work for you.

What exactly is a vegan diet?
If you decide to eat vegan, you will have to shun animal products like meat, fish, eggs, honey, milk and milk products like cottage cheese, curd, cream, ghee and even normal chocolates. All grains, beans, legumes, vegetables, fruits and food combinations made from these make a nutritious part of you diet. Nuts, seeds, pulses, whole grain and soy products fulfil your protein requirements, while tofu, leafy green vegetables and dried fruits give you calcium. Along with leafy green vegetables, add mushrooms to make up for some important vitamins.

But don’t lose heart if you are a dairy lover. There are enough vegan substitutes available! Soy milk can be had instead of cow’s milk. Staetta and Sofit are two varieties available easily in different flavours besides their natural form. Tofu can replace cottage cheese in your diet. Peanut milk can be used in place of buttermilk while sunflower oil can be used instead of butter. Let dairy-free cream take the place of cream in your recipes. And if you love chocolate, Bournville is vegan! There are also restaurants which serve vegan food. Cafe Coffee Day serves a vegan shake and Irish coffee. The Green Stove in Thane and Mumbai provides vegan cakes, cookies, breads, cheesecakes, chocolates and appetizers on order.

The pros
Meats contain saturated fats which are not good for health. So do full cream milk and eggs. Giving up these products also lowers your risk of heart diseases because your intake of cholesterol is automatically reduced. Less consumption of fat keeps your blood pressure and weight in check. Vegetarian food is rich in fibre and keeps you feeling energetic all day, besides giving you a feeling of fullness for a longer duration.

Diet rich in animal fat is also said to increase the risk of colon cancer, so this is also one health risk you can evade. There is adequate proof today that when a vegan diet is consumed keeping a check on vegetable oil intake as well, the deadly diabetes can not only be controlled but also reversed. Hypertension, obesity and auto-immune diseases can also be controlled, say experts. “The risk of rheumatoid arthritis, kidney diseases, gallstones and cancer is also reduced by following a vegan diet,” says Deepshikha Agarwal, a dietician and sports nutritionist from Mumbai. Rita Theobald, who has been on a vegan diet for almost 15 years, admits to having got over her constant bouts of cough and cold and menstrual cramps after becoming a vegan.

And the cons
It is said that the vegan diet cannot fulfil a human body’s need for certain nutrients like Vitamin B12. Agarwal recommends a Vitamin B12 supplement regularly after consultation with your dietician/doctor to avoid any inadequacy.

It is not difficult to follow a vegan diet if you have the will. All you need is a good diet plan. “Poor meal planning is the cause of nutritional deficiencies in vegetarian diets, not the absence of animal foods,” wraps up Agarwal.

Watch TV commercials for hot beauty tips

Femina reader and ardent fan Garima Anal thinks commercials can unveil a treasure trove of beauty secrets beneficial for you. She shares her TV lessons with you.

How about relaxing on a fluffy couch watching your favourite serial with a hot mug of aromatic coffee? Fantastic isn’t it? And how about a redundant commercial breaking the flow? Irritating. It’s a yes with almost all of us; why do they need to put such large commercial breaks in between?

If we keep aside this undesired debate, there is a big deal we can learn from these commercials be it your hair, skin anything. There are at least 20 hair care products being aired everyday with every single claiming to be the best because of its miraculous plug-ins which others lack. Let’s not put our head into which one is the best but rather keep a sharp eye on its key plug-ins, for example lemon, olive oil, coconut oil, amla, jojoba oil etc.

If you are looking for a herbal solution for your hair, these ingredients can really work wonders. Let’s talk about them one by one.


Lemon is considered as a boon for sick hair, if you are troubled with dandruff, apply lemon juice to your scalp; keep it for 10-15 minutes and rinse off; do it twice a week for a month and see results. For split ends put, add some coconut oil in lemon juice and message thoroughly on your scalp. And if you think your hair look dull, squeeze the juice out of few lemons, mix it with a third amount of water and put it in a plastic spray bottle. Spray it all over your hair before stepping out for all over shine.

Olive oil improves the strength and elasticity of hair. To get rid of itchiness or lice, apply warm olive oil in your hair and scalp and leave it overnight. This will smother the lice and cure any itchiness.

Coconut oil has been used since ancient times for lustrous long hair. Regular messaging of coconut oil is very beneficial for dry hair. To get rid of grey hair gradually, boil some curry leaves in coconut oil and apply to the hair roots and scalp. Rinse with normal water after an hour.

Amla, also known as Indian gooseberry is an excellent hair rejuvenator and a very nourishing herb which prevents scalp infections, hair loss and premature greying. Here is a recipe for one of the best hair masks: Take two table spoons of dried Amla powder and add one table spoon of olive oil and plain yogurt each to make a paste. Apply this to your scalp and hair. Leave the treatment for an hour and rinse off with a mild shampoo. You may even try homemade Amla oil. Here is how you can make it: Take 2 tsps Amla powder, 1 tsp fenugreek powder and add one bowl coconut oil. Heat it on low flame till Amla is brown (not black), let it cool and then store it in a cool dry place (do not refrigerate).

Jojoba oil is a great moisturizer and healer for all types of hair. Add 2 tsps of jojoba oil to your regular shampoo to enhance moisture. Put a few drops of jojoba oil into your hands, rub them and work the oil into the ends of your hair, this will help to keep slit ends and frizzing in check.

So next time when you see a TV commercial, rejoice, may be it stores a billion for you.